I believe I can fly

Actually, I believe I will never fly again. Color me traumatized.

We took a trip this past weekend to the Technik Museum Speyer about an hour away, near Heidelberg. It was an awesome museum--probably the best I've ever been to. (And I feel like that's saying something, since I've been to almost all the Smithsonian Museums.) 

The Technik museum was all about transportation, including my favorite part: space exploration. Yes, it had all the things you'd expect to see at an air and space museum- planes, moon rocks, etc.  But what this place had that I've never experienced anywhere else, was a real 747. Not a life sized replica...an actual aircraft that they actually flew in to the nearest airfield, disassembled on the flight line, put on a truck to be taken to the museum, then reassembled IN THE AIR. That's right. The plane is "in flight", meaning it's tilted as if it's taking off or doing a slight roll in the air! It's really kind of awe inspiring and the best part is that you can actually climb about six flights of stairs to explore the inside of this massive aircraft. More on this later-first let me walk you through the rest of the day before I embarrass myself. 

After we meandered around the inside of the museum, we decided to go out to the huge courtyard that held all the aircraft (and a coastguard ship and a German U 9 submarine). We went in the helicopters and the ships and the cargo plane. Everything was fine. The kids-even/especially Peyton- were having a BLAST. I have to admit, I was too, despite the chilly weather. But, when we'd had all we could take of the cold, we had lunch and headed to the space building. 

This was where things got a little goofy. Why do the Germans have a giant-again not replica-Russian space shuttle? Or a lunar rover vehicle? Or "Neil Armstrong's" space suit? It baffles my mind and frankly makes me a little territorial, that there is a whole exhibit about the US space program in another country. But I digress. We walked around there for a bit checking everything out. And then the selfies started. I find myself doing anything I can to get my preteen daughters to laugh these days. So, selfies with the moon, Neil Armstrong, Buzz Aldrin, the Earth, the space shuttle. You name it, I selfie'd with it. 

After the space building, we decided to explore the gigantic 747. We went back out to the courtyard, climbed sooo many stairs, and went in. Did I mention it's "in flight"? Completely tilted so that if you're not careful, you will go careening to the other side of the plane. And the Germans- they don't really do warning signs or safety gates. I guess they figure you'll sort it out. "Let them fall...I bet that'll teach them." It's bananas. 

Now...cue the hyperventilation.

I tend to be prone to anxiety attacks. I always seem to picture the worst possible scenario at the worst possible time. This time was no different. Did the plane just move?! Don't let the baby down. Girls-get away from there. Don't open that hatch! I was a lunatic. And I have a minor heart condition that causes my pulse to race unexpectedly and with no real reason. After all the stairs and the onset of my anxiety attack, I needed air quickly. So I stepped out the door clearly marked exit. What was NOT clearly marked was where I was exiting to: the wing of the plane. Boy that was helpful. 

So needless to say, when we were all safely on the ground and the aircraft did not fall on us after all, I decided I'm either staying here forever, or they'll have to ship me back to the States!